Monday, March 1, 2010

Toyota Commercials


What's up with all the new Toyota commercials? Did someone tell them a commercial blitz is the way to win back consumer confidence? I do not believe that to be an effective game plan. The typical American mindset is what have you done for me lately. Spending millions on TV commercials simply ain't it boo.

Give folks, in particular those inconvenienced by this SNAFU, some freebies. You know free oil change, front-end alignment, rotate the wheels . . . You get the point--spend those millions on your customers. Then give the party, whose idea this was, a lie detector test to determine their real motive.

The $64 million question remains. Who cut Toyota's break-line? Was this internal I spy? It does not add up. Toyota put the 'Q' in quality assurance and we are being told their stuff was as raggedy as Bay-Bay's six weeks old weave. Here is where the plot seems to develop some intrigue; I hear it was not the Japanese (Japan) side where the boom was banged, but rather the American (the U.S.) division. You mean to tell me Americans could possibly be possibly be responsible for something so dastardly evil? Please say it ain’t so! Commercials will not fix this.

Hey T, perhaps you need to curtail your outflow and hold on to your cash. I have a feeling you just might need every dime.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Who Dat? You Got To Be Kidding . . .

Or am I infringing on someone's copyright? There is a controversy over the copyright owner of "who dat?" I cannot imagine what is being said about Americans in the world press. The world is filled with real problems and Americans with nothing better to do are squabbling over the ownership of "who dat?"
How many dead third grade English teachers and grammerians are augerring through their internment vaults over the blatant decline in proper English?

So what's next? What about f-u? Should some enterprising soul seek a copyright on m-f? Did anyone copyright what's zup? That's a good one.  Yes, only in America. Perhaps this is the nations ascent from  the mythical historically streets of gold to words worth their weight in gold. 

Back to who dat. Is this not as old as the existence of  uneducated folks? Should the current trend towards popularizing poor grammar continues, an apology will be owed to every person ever criticized, made fun of, or was turned downed for a job because of  grammar.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Monday, January 11, 2010

Tiger Woods: Free At Last


There is something inherently wrong with an industry that allows its chief assets to be placed in such a precarious position that the slightest bump in the road can send the asset spiraling out of control or off its perch. Basing a career on an image that is unsustainable is unwise and a gamble. But life is filled with gamblers. If the payout is big enough, the gambler will risk being unwise.

So what is the goal that the development team wants to accomplish for the artist? Ultimately, most people want fame and to make a lot of money. So the artist has talent, maybe a little or maybe a lot. It really does not matter. There are artists with a wee bit of talent, a lot of push, some luck—you know the right place at the right time or born under the right stars. Whatever, but they catapult to the neighboring galaxy.  The artist and the spin-doctors come up with an image to project to the audience.

We have all witnessed artist after artist fall from grace. To put it in the vernacular, star after star burn out. It has been said that Whitney was portrayed as a good girl. For the 16 (?) years she was married to Bobby Brown, everybody and their momma were baffled as to what she saw in him. Whitney is making an impressive comeback. Clive Davis—bless his heart—came to her rescue and apparently did what no one else was able to do. Kudos to Clive. After all, was it not Clive who created her image the first time around?

We are well aware that not every actor’s career ends in shambles and shame. The late Paul Newman comes to mind for example--once divorced and twice married. During the time of his first marriage, divorce was not without its stigma. Yet his career survived. Newman and second wife Joanna Woodard, with five decades of matrimonial relationship, became the poster-couple proof that a marriage can last until death do we part.

So we come to Tiger Woods. He was a child when his career began. He had been under the tutelage of his father until the senior Woods’ death. Was it so much an image his development team manufactured, or was he, up to that point, just a good kid. To qualify good kid, I mean good in the sense he was not a hooligan. We all think our kids are good. Just like our parents thought we were good. There is a Scripture that says all our righteousness is like fifthly rags. You get the point. So when Tiger comes out of his bag, the world is aghast. Why? We never knew this person. How can we possibly be disappointed by the actions of someone we do not know? And if he committed adultery, is that not between Tiger and his wife? Dare America judge this man when the value on smut is at a premium in this country? Case in point Ms. Paris Hilton. Her only claim to fame was an alleged sex video—not a professionally produced porn film, mind you—but a video with her boyfriend. She reported earned $22 million somewhere between 2007 and 2008.

So what is the solution? Are the expectations placed on these individuals too high? Are they and their team responsible for the illusion and subsequently are solely responsible when the film gets tangled in the projector, leaving the audience hanging in the middle of the scene? Perhaps. After all, each of us is the captain of our own destiny and the master of our own soul. In creating an illusion of myself, or giving permission for such an illusion to be created, I bare that responsibility for the possibility that it may dissolve.  The dissolution of the image is all the more apt, when the illusion depends on human efforts to keep it afloat.

This is the United States of America, land of the image-makers. If you are looking to make it big you have two sure shots—your ascent and your descent. Plan them both wisely. With the right exit strategy, your last paycheck could be bigger than the preceding ones combined. Where does Tiger go from here? Anywhere he wants to go. He doesn’t need Gillette, Gatorade, or Nike. Even if his wife takes half of everything he has . . . he is now free to move about the cabin.

Imagine that.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Joan Rivers: I Ain't Mad At You, Girl!


Joan Rivers was back in the entertainment news this evening. Apparently there was a SNAFU with a custom's agent not being able to reconcile the name on Joan's boarding pass with the name on her passport. Although the debacle made for excellent PR, it is a non-issue to me. I just want to say, "YOU GO GIRL!" Joan looks fabulous and anybody who says she does not, is lying cause they are hating! I don't know who her surgeon is but the man should receive an Oscar. How do you make a 76-year old woman look that fab?

Joan has been the butt of jokes--including her own--for more years than half the gossip-tainment staff been alive. If you have money--make it work for you--Oprah.  I am sure Joan is willing to give his name. Not to cause any trouble, but Joan looked better than Melissa. Just an observation.

Joan, I am sure Mae West is applauding you with me. Hey, there is plenty of time to be full of wrinkles in the grave. Life is for the living.

Happy New Year!

P.S. I would like to see the haters do a photo shoot without their mascara and foundation. When the make-up no longer work for you, hit Joan up for that number!

Saturday, January 2, 2010

The King's Robe



It's New Year's Eve 2009. In recent history that bit of information has been a non-issue. But this year we actually received an invitation. Then we received a second invitation. So I ordered my red dress for the occasion and I was pretty much ready to go. But there was a nagging suspicion that the dress and I were not going to meld. You see, dressing for me is like an art form – I have to feel it. Notwithstanding, living down wind from Canada presents an added dimension to the whole getting dressed to go-out-thing. It’s called warmth.


The one event was black-tie. My dress was red and it was not sending out positive vibes. It was not as though I could run to the mall and pick up a substitute--although I have done that. What was interesting was the fact that I was not overly concerned. I had been wearing black for six months. Why not end the year in the black instead of the red? That is really okay!


Happy New Year!